— Wide Awake, Erwin McManus
Wonderful King by David Crowder Band
Just found myself singing this. What I’m going through doesn’t change who God is - my beautiful Savior, my wonderful King.
A few weeks ago, I was listening to a wise man preach about chasing after the things of God; going for the life lived in God’s will. Chasing after success, relationships etc wouldn’t satisfy. In life, our core yearns for a walk, run, soar with God.
To soar with God… Imagine that.
But what really blew me away was when the preacher said, ‘Walk in the dangerous side with God.’
By that he meant God has adventures for us. We just have to step in faith for the awesomest ride of our lives.
So, that was really the point, but during that time, I was feeling drowsy (must be the noon time thing), so I think my mind drifted off elsewhere to it’s own taking-in of the sermon.
When I heard ‘dangerous side with God’, suddenly, the whole thing was about the pursuit of God’s dangerous side. WHUT? God’s dangerous side?
I began to recall and imagine. Didn’t God lead the Israelites to war, instructing them to annihilate their enemy? Didn’t God, out of His passionate love, tell his people who broke his heart, ‘What am I to do with you?’
I’ve been so used to my walk with God as sturdy. Steady. Grace. Forgiveness. Mercy. That cradling kind of love.
Then there’s this image of the sacred heart of Jesus - stoic. If Jesus’ heart was burning, wouldn’t it be with consuming flames? Passionate love. What if it longs and cries out like thunder? How would it defend when angered? The thought of it made me shiver. Jesus wasn’t only compared to a lamb. He was also compared to a lion.
These were my thoughts while the preaching was going on. I prayed - God, there’s more to You that I don’t know of. As I chase after You, could You show me that side of You? That dangerous side.
How does your heart burn? Show me your strength. The angels fear and adore you - why?
Through these thoughts, I believe God was challenging me, luring me and stirring a hunger in me for his dangerous side.
Vision is a power that motivates us to do great things, give great things, and love at all times. Vision keeps us going when there doesn’t appear to be any other reason to keep pushing forward toward the goal.
When the years are showing on my face
And my strongest days are gone
When my heart and flesh depart this place
From a life that sung your song
You’ll still be the one I want
— Arithmetic, Brooke Fraser
— Bob Sorge
— In You, Sonicflood
“I am a man who has seen affliction, by the rod of his wrath. He has driven me away and made me walk in darkness rather than light; he has turned his hand against me again and again, all day long. He has made my skin grow old and broken my bones. He has surrounded me with bitterness and hardship. He has made me dwell in darkness like the dead. He has walled me in so I cannot escape; he has weighed me down with chains. Even when I call out or cry for help, he shuts out my prayer. He has barred my way with blocks of stone; he has made my paths crooked.” (Lamentations 3:1-10 NIV)
…You can’t see why God allows what he allows in your life, and God doesn’t owe you an explanation, because he’s God and you aren’t. But someday, and it might not be until you get to heaven, you’ll be able to look back and see the big plan. Until that day comes, keep taking your concerns to God.
I’ve always been encouraged to dream big dreams, so that’s what I’ve been doing. Up to a certain point.
I’d strain all my muscles, reach up for the sky. Stand tiptoes on a ladder. At least I hope I could reach for the moon. Tie a yarn around it. Swing real hard. Jump. Land on that star. Dance!
Hah!
Landing on stars. Right.
I really felt that I fooled myself into believing that I may dream dreams. That I can run with my heart in my hand - my compass.
God, was I fooled. So I stopped the child from singing. I’m getting older anyway. I got out of the wild-goose chase and into a rat race. Maybe this is how life ought to be. Stable? Steady? Waking up. Sleeping. Waking up to another day. And another day. And another day…
God, dreaming. It breaks my heart.
And I learned that it’s okay. It’s beautiful - a heart with battle scars.
—
Come Thou Fount
I think these lines are real lovely. :)
